Sakura's Sakura
by tHouGht buBbLes
Summary: .."Wind was freed again. Sakura petals were still falling just like before. It was like; again, prosperous drops of tears were sliding down from my eyes. Ah… I still haven’t forgotten her…. never in my entire life..." -Syaoran (a tribute to Sakura's bday)


_This one-shot fic was written on Syaoran's point of view. All of their ages were about mid-twenties. A tribute to Sakura's birthday, please read it with all your heart._

To my partymates in pRO! (just finished playing so... anyway, they didn't know all abt. this!) rok on guys!

Avon... Madie... you guys are the best! trippin' this april fools! this is for you!

and to FlowerLover... thanks! (winks)

DISCLAIMER: CCS… ©CLAMP®… I wish Syaoran's mine! (laughs devilishly)

**Sakura's Sakura**

_-by thoughtbubbles

* * *

_

You wouldn't think the sun would boastfully give away its heat, one Friday morning, at about ten o' clock. Bringing with me my suitcase, along with some papers that were quite crumpled in my hand, I hurriedly left my condo unit and started walking. Exactly at that time my cellular phone rang, and it flashes no name. I answered it, and you won't believe me, I found myself shouting like lost in a blissful road. I thought I could somehow enjoy the madness, but hell—I have this nagging feeling that _he_ might not come and attend the meeting to my entire request.

"Damn Eriol-kun, you must be there! I can't stand there without you at my side!" I said with whole irritation while walking promptly on the sidewalk.

"D-Demo, Syaoran-kun, I can't just cancel what Tomoyo and I planned to do today!" wistfully he said on the other line. His voice was like pleading as if he was a child. I just let him tattle, with my annoyance I just kept still.

Eriol let out a retrieving sigh, as if really doing it on purpose. "W-We are visiting a _very important person_—"

"You guys could always visit whoever that person he is, but not now!" I tried to restrain my voice, to remain it calm as possible before my day gets totally ruined. For three sleepless nights I have gone nervous, for I was assigned to present the said proposal. And now this!

"G-Gomen Nasai, Syaoran…" his voice was clear and positive. He really meant it! "I'll try to catch up with all of you! Promise!" he said once more with assurance and a little guilt.

"..." I couldn't say anything; one instance I want to wring his neck but then, one part of me understands him. He has a family now.

"Syaoran…"

"I can never compete with your first love, buddy…" I finally said, my words bonded with a little gag, but with a little envy too and I can't remember why I feel this thing. Those couple were very kind to me, ever since. All these thoughts were gone as I come to approach my black car. "She might eat me alive, you know…"

I heard him laugh excitingly. "Arigato! Arigato Gozaimasu!" he said in between chuckles. "D-Demo, Syaoran?" his tone started to slow down.

"Nande? I might change my mind if you—"

"A-Are you sure you don't remember what—"

"Moshi-Moshi? M-Moshi-Mosh… E-Eriol? M-Mo—" I came motionless, and looked down at my phone. _Beep! Beep! Beep! _"Shit!" hardly I held my phone like I wanted to crush it upon uttering that word. Why in this chance of my life my phone battery had drained! Goodness…

I checked upon my watch. _10:09 AM._ From afar, there's my vehicle, waiting for me in front of the Tomoeda Penguin Park. Ah… Sure I have a spare battery, I always had one. I took few more steps as I was getting the car key on my pocket. When I finally reached the door, and was about to put on the key to the hole, my attention was caught by an auburn-haired girl from the park swinging on the playground. Another feeling rose up on me, I don't know why. There are lots of children who were playing there too but she's the only one whom I really have noticed. There were sensations coming back that I can't even explain why, upon staring at her. A little while, I ended up smiling to myself, seeing her swayed leisurely by the wind. 'Feels so good just being young', I thought to myself.

I put on the key, opened the door and started finding for the reserve. I'll call my secretary to inform her that I would be late for about thirty minutes. So, I hurriedly removed the back phone case, the old battery, and then placed a new one, put all back in one piece, opened the button and…

When my eyes looked up to gather some sunlight, I was moved again to see the direction of the girl, but all this while she has stopped and I observed she had her head turned down, her face hiding in between hands. It was like she's up into a bad day like me.

I don't know what made me think of opening the door, walk around and found myself heading towards her place. She remained still at her position. After a step, I slowly bent my knees and faced her. She was still motionless staring the ground. I was about to speak, not until…

"You… you baka! You said you'll come as you've promised…!"

_Y-You said you'll come back… but where are you now?_

Shocked, I felt quite confused upon hearing what she said in between hiccups. She is really crying, but those words had penciled my heart. And as if something from the past was digging me… I don't know why.

"I was waiting for so long! How come you'd do this to me?"

"A-Ah… A-Anone…"

"LIAR!" she shouted in between muffles. "Lia—"

She'd raised her head up, and though she was tightly gripping the rope that upholding her to look like floating in the swing, her emerald eyes were like fusing anger and disappointment upon looking at me. Instantly, those ferocious looks were gone as her face seemed very astounded. Maybe her senses had told her I'm not the one she's looking at. Speechless, she gazed at my eyes with shame.

"A-Ano! G-G-Gomen N-Nasai…!"

"It's okay." I said with a smile plastered on my lips. I suddenly felt a little tense, I can't even explain it. Her emerald eyes with a splotch of sadness were like questioning mine. I think… I think I've seen this before, but I can't figure where. Instead, I quickly got a hanky from my pocket. "Here."

"Arigato…" softly she muttered.

In silence, I cleared my throat and began to ask. "Are you waiting here for so long?"

The girl nodded but didn't respond. Perhaps she was just lightening up herself the moment I saw her a while ago.

"Hmm…" I can't help but to hum, seeming withdrawn. I thought again of something to ask about. "Who are you… waiting for?"

"…"

"May I know?"

Her face quite rose up, but her round emerald eyes were staring off into the distance. "J-Just… Just one… A-Ano… m-my best friend."

"I see." sighing, I went on for more. "Has she arrived—?"

"He's a boy."

Feeling ashamed and a little surprised, I stared at her for a moment and then gulped for air. It is quite strange for a girl like her to actually befriending a guy, imagining her radiance to somewhat girly and furtive. Moving on, I cleared my throat and wet my lips as my unbeatable mannerism.

"W-Well…? Has he?"

She remained silent as her head telling like no. Isn't that obvious? I felt stupid for asking her that way.

"But why!" grinning I said. "He shouldn't let a pretty girl like you wait for a long time!" then I grinned. It was true she had that lovely face. I think I've seen her somewhere. I just can't remember when. "What's the occasion anyway?"

It took for about five seconds until she replied. She turned her head down once again. "It's my birthday."

Surprised, I felt my heart beat fast, unexplainably; as if I've been imagining something that doesn't exist. "Tsk…! Really a baka… Is he…" I just said in a snap, referring it to that dim-witted boy. "He's mean."

Her shoulders started to shake, signaling for a new break of teardom. "Hai. And for five straight years he's been doing this to me!" there. She completely whined. "I am hurting…"

I felt pity towards her, and at the same time the annoyance to the kid who actually ignores her for all his care. In that situation, I don't want to leave her just like that, knowing the fact that today's her birthday, so…

"C-mon…" I said as I stood up, extending my hand. "C'mon, treat me. After all, it's your day!"

Shocked, she met my eyes with hers. "H-Hoooeee! N-Nani ga!"

"Just kidding…" I said, smiling. "Iie, I'm going to be the one who'll treat you, ne?"

"D-Demo…" she protested; her questioning eyes were still locked into mine. "…I-I believe you still have work to do—"

"Nah…" I got one hand and pulled her; she didn't say anything until we left the park. I don't know exactly why I'm doing this, but I found myself wanting somebody's company… her company, I suppose.

I took a glance on her. She was still in that state of shock look; maybe she thought I'll kidnap her or something. But then, she didn't say a thing. I checked up on again my watch… _10:24._ Sluggishness as it may call to what I'm feeling for work, I don't care. "Daijoubu, ne?" I grinned. "They could always wait…"

* * *

"…And it was sooo big! Sometimes I think how Onii-chan manages to put it on to himself!" Wholeheartedly the girl told about her brother wearing a mascot as his job as what she says. On a bench we sat for a while, beside the ice cream vendor. In fact, we're actually almost done. 

"Really, huh?" engagingly I asked. I was really enjoying, just being with her. "Hope I could see too…"

"Hmm? Which one? Him or the mascot?"

I chuckled. She's one bright girl too! "Hahaha! Both!"

She suddenly smirked. "To tell you, I hate him! He always pertain me as a kaijuu! Say…" steadily she closed her eyes and breathe. "Do I look like one?"

_Onii-chan says I'm like a kaijuu! I hate him so much! Say, Do I really look like one, huh?_

I started to feel again the fright. This isn't funny anymore. Now it happens habitually, but I don't know why! My thoughts began to venture—to a place, or in a time like when I'm hearing all this things. I'm coming closer… closer… closer until…

The girl dragged my sleeve. "S-Sir?"

I felt astounded, seemed awakened. "H-Ha?"

She snorted. "I wasn't wrong… You're like them…"

_You're like them… You're all the same!_

"A-Ano…" I mumbled, thinking of something to say for covering up my silence. These things were surprising me. "O-Of course not! In fact, you looked like an angel to me…" truthfully I said.

She rested her back on the bench. "Hmmf… You're saying that because it's my birthday and the guy whom I supposed to be with is gone and left me."

"No! I mean it." I smiled widely upon uttering those words while messing up her hair. "That's why I wanted to see him… to give him a blow!" I grinned as I demonstrate her a swift punch.

"You can't beat him!" her emerald eyes widened as she yelled, and then laughed like crazy. "He's more of a kaijuu!" and chortled once more. What really amazed me was the way she reacted, she responded… and the way she moved… It was very much familiar. Her laughs made me think of another flashing back of memories I can't tell. I smiled though, for it was a nice experience to smile about, just being with this girl…

…it was like I've been doing this to someone before.

"Sir?"

Lightly, I pinched her cheek, and beamed at her. "Onii-chan… Syaoran… anything but not addressing me like that! You're making me go older."

We both laughed. "G-Gomen Nasai." timidly she said while scratching her head. Yes… every single thing she does makes me imagine of one person. "S-Syaoran-nii-chan? How old are you now?"

"Twenty-seven."

After a while she came mute—in her arms was Syaoran, a dark blue teddy bear I gave to her a while ago that was named after me. She spoke again, to my surprise. "Aren't you sad?"

I stopped, and then faced her. "Sometimes... Even more when I'm alone…" I blurted without thinking.

She hugged Syaoran close to her. "Hai… and all you have to do is to wait an amazing thing to happen." she said. I felt a sudden discomfort. This talk was not nearing to amuse her more.

"Hey! It's your day! You should be glad!" I strongly said. "Aren't you glad you have me with you?"

"I-Iie! It's not that!" she squeaked. "In fact, I'm very happy." she stopped and contacted me in the eye. "I'm very happy because you're here with me."

_I'm very happy, because you… are here… at my side… all this very while._

There's this feeling rising in my heart. I won't pretend anymore; because of this kid I am starting to feel the feeling I used to. I smiled… I smiled contentedly.

"Let's go somewhere! Anywhere, Syaoran-nii-chan!"

"Huh?" I looked puzzled. "But where else?"

"Far from this place!" her eyes crinkled. "A hill!"

Grabbing one hand of hers, we reached my car, turned on the engine and called quickly my secretary.

"B-But, Mr. Li—S-Sir—"

Turning off the phone, I decided to go far from the city. I as well wanted to run away. It's like my feet was bringing me away from Tomoeda. I'll come with this girl, so I can get the answers that I've been craving for.

* * *

Tiring it may was, I fully enjoyed the day. Being unaware, the sun takes off its lingering heat, creating a golden sky. With my coat hung on my shoulder, I was fond of looking at her from afar, dancing and playing in the grass, bathing her self with dried Sakura petals as she repeatedly gathered a bundle, and then tossing them up high in the air. 

"Syaoran-nii-chan! Come! Join me!"

_Syaoran… Come near me, quick! It's raining!_

Happiness on its very unique point... Good that her supposedly companion wasn't there to feel what he should be feeling right now. There… I ended seeing myself heading to her way, my hands reaching her hands, closer… got it and…

* * *

"Though now you're feeling lonely, you'll never be alone…" 

Mixed feelings… Calming… Peaceful… The feeling of something's essential has come back to you, that's what like I'm feeling. She sat beside me; together we ogled after the open sky, and on the bird's horizon, the awakened city.

"It's like I have all the things I wanted: good job, status in life, shelter, car… I couldn't ask for anything else. But then again, I can't just kid around and fool myself forever. I got tired too."

"…"

Years have passed and gone rapidly. I laughed weakly. God, I think I'm lost…

"I wanted _her_ smiling… I want to see her smile because of what I am today. D-Demo…"

"'Nii-chan—"

"…you—"

"—Syaoran. I'm still here."

Instantly I felt her lean on my side. Perhaps she was worn-out dancing and hopping. I just let her be. I leaned on her too, and I felt again the tranquil moment… just the fact that I'm with her… just with her… was all I need to have.

She had gone withdrawn, but I know she's hearing me. I whispered. "Odd, but I don't know you yet. What's your name by the wa—?"

She was out of my sight. No time for doubts; she's gone, and to my surprise… to my surprise, I still can't believe—I didn't imagine…

Divine petals descending from above, a Sakura tree was leaning on me. No… I was… all along… leaning on a Sakura tree.

Still sitting, I continued looking for the girl. Twitching into a feeling of heartbreak, salt water was racing down competing in my both cheeks. I have arrived to a familiar place… a place that I longed to forget… as a mark was all along touched beneath my hand.

I buried along my memories… five years… I wanted to get over… to start anew, so I tried to forget all about her, to disregard every thing related to her. I started to become busy, and became deaf to the crowd. I didn't know; I've hurt her. I didn't know all this forgetting stuff; I had hurt her so much. And I… I was feeling the same.

That girl… she made me remind of the woman I forgot... the woman I loved the most whom was lost. My eyes gone big, held my breath… No… NO! I… I was…

_Y-You said you'll come back… but where are you now, _Li Syaoran_? Liar…_

_Onii-chan says I'm kaijuu! Say, do I really look like one, huh?_

_You're like them, _Syaoran_… You're all the same!_

Syaoran_… Come near me…_

_I'm very happy, because you… _Li Syaoran_… is here… at my side… all this very while._

I was that gaki boy whom she waited for five years. Five long years… I smirked painfully as I wiped off the transparent stain in my skin. Loosening my necktie, unbuttoned the first in my shirt, I got something from my chest. I raised it up until to my face level, and gazed deeply at a pair of silver ring dangling at my silver necklace.

_Syaoran… I'm still here._

Again, I rested my back, along with my head to Sakura's Sakura. Holding still my rings, I put it back to my chest, closer to my heart.

_**April 1, 1987.**_

"O tanjoubi Omedetou…"

Wind was freed again. Sakura petals were still falling just like before. Softly I hand a stroke to a marble board underneath my palm. It was like; again, prosperous drops of tears were sliding down from my eyes. Ah… I still haven't forgotten her…. never in my entire life…

_Arigato, Syaoran… Daisuki yo…_

"Iie, Sakura…" I mumbled as I close my eyes. I left all my thoughts: the company, the proposal… Tomoeda. Traveling, I was seeing myself reaching for her cheeks, wiping them dry in my bare hands. "Thank you…"

The sun had hit me. Sakura's Sakura… My arm that was resting on my knee has been kissed by her pink drops like rain. It was a lovely feeling.

"Daisuki desu…"

* * *

From afar, two figures stood still beside his black car, watching him. The ebony-haired woman of about mid-twenties of age was cradling fresh white roses in her arms. She locked her mouth, sobbed as she bent her head to the man beside her, who was wearing a pair of round spectacles. 

"Honey, look…" Eriol said to his wife while pointing a dark-blue teddy bear lying on the driver's seat of Syaoran's car.

Tomoyo smiled in full content as she held her husband's arm. "Just when you thought all things in him has changed…" she met Eriol's eyes. "…but his feelings…" she returned her gaze upon Syaoran and added, "…the most important one remains the same."

* * *

888_Owari _888 

_-_

you liked it? send me reviews then... and oh, happy birthday to those people whose birthday is in April 1! thanks!


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